Achieving Self Mastery – How to Become the Creator of Your Own Life

Self mastery is a gift you deserve to give yourself. Knowing, accepting, and loving who you are, forms the basis for achieving self mastery.

Self mastery allows you to become the creator and victor of your life, instead of a victim of circumstances and the world around you. Self mastery is a skill and a gift. Once acquired, it bestows the knowledge that you are the master of your own life. It gives you a deeper understanding of your own thoughts, beliefs, feelings, and actions.

How to Achieve Self Mastery

To get to the point where you can truly say you are the master of your own life requires three key elements:

Increasing Awareness

Increased awareness is the first step in the voyage toward self mastery. When you are really aware you are able to be fully present with the events that unfold around you and with yourself. Being fully aware of yourself is perhaps the greatest state of awareness you can accomplish.

Self awareness is like ‘dancing in the moment’, being conscious of every move you make, feeling what you feel, and noticing what you think – without judgment!

Self awareness gives you access to the resources within you. It frees you to be open, authentic, and self-reflective. Many people get so caught up in the ‘busy-ness’ of life that they take little time to reflect on the choices they are making. When you are self aware, you are consciously making decisions that are aligned with your core values and personal beliefs.

Accept What Is

The second principle of self mastery, accepting what is, is often challenging. To accept what is, you have to accept who you are and where you find yourself at the present time. It requires being patient and understanding with yourself; knowing and accepting that you are doing the best you know how in any given moment.

Accepting what is, means suspending or letting go of the judgments you make about yourself, others, and the events in your life. When you judge what you see and how you feel, you push away the opportunity to change. It is only when you give up ‘what should be’ that you can fully experience the perfection of ‘what is’.

When you accept what is, you will begin to experience the freedom this new perspective brings. When you lose the blinders of restricting beliefs and accept the gift of clarity, you will see options and opportunities that were previously unavailable to you. Accepting what is, is perhaps the greatest gift you could ever give yourself.

Seek To Understand

The final step toward self mastery is seeking to understand yourself. With self knowledge you understand how you operate and what motivates you. You maximize your innate ability to grow and change. Understanding precedes change!

Seeking to understand is not about trying to identify what is right or wrong. Here again, it is important to avoid judgment and find value in all expressions and experiences of your life. To increase self knowledge, you must accept that each experience in life is useful and necessary; that they are conduits for personal growth and evolution.

Here are insights and questions that will enable you to continue your own journey toward self mastery:

  1. Make a commitment to self-knowledge with the clear intention of achieving mastery of yourself and your innate ability to create the life you want.
  2. Notice and become aware of your thoughts, feelings and actions.
  3. Begin to experiment by seeing each moment as an opportunity to choose the experiences you want.
  4. Write an affirmation statement to reinforce the belief that you are doing the best you know how. Read this statement to yourself many times a day.
  5. Picture yourself accepting life for what it is – each day consciously rid yourself of negative, judgmental thoughts. Soon, feeling and thinking without judgment will become natural.
  6. Take time to analyze the events and circumstances in your life.What have you learned?What has made you stronger?What mistakes are you repeating?What have you done better the second time around?What will you continue to work on?
  7. Apply everything you learn about yourself to your pursuit of self mastery

Self mastery is a gift you deserve to give yourself. Knowing, accepting, and loving who you are, forms the basis for achieving self mastery – these are the qualities that will allow you to be present in every moment and learn from everything without judgment. Nobody can ever know more about you than yourself and with self mastery, no body and no thing can ever determine your life’s path but yourself.

A Guide to Improving Self-Concept

The key to a happy life, successful career, strong relationships, and a general well-being has a good self-concept. Sometimes, however, that takes work. Julia T. Wood lines out four steps to developing a good self-concept in her book Interpersonal Communication: Everyday Encounters. She says the key is making a firm commitment to personal growth, gain and use knowledge to support personal growth, set goals that are realistic and fair, and seek contexts that support personal change.

Make a firm commitment to personal growth

The first thing to do when deciding to improve self-concept is actually making the commitment to improve self-concept. It is a challenge and takes work. It’s cliché, but things are easier said than done. This means not letting setbacks prohibit moving forward and persevering through resistance.

Components of Self-ConceptGain and use knowledge to support personal growth

The first thing to do is identify what the current self-concept is and determine how that self-concept came to be. The second thing need is obtaining information about oneself. There are four types of information. The first is open information, which is known to both the individual and others. The second type is the blind area that others can see but the individual can’t. This might be something like an individual believing they are weak but others seeing strength. The hidden area is the area that an individual knows about but chooses not to share with others. The last part is the unknown area that no one has discovered yet. Obtaining all knowledge possible (and asking others for more information) can be very helpful.

Set goals that are realistic and fair

People who decide to work out for the first time will go to the gym and try and run three miles the first day. They burn out fast and give up quickly. The same concept applies here. Pick small goals, and work towards them. Don’t take on too much in the beginning and add or expand goals as the first ones get mastered.

Seek contexts that support personal change

If one wants to stop partying, they might not want to surround themselves with a party atmosphere. Someone trying to learn to be independent might want to move away from parents. Create an environment that will enhance the path toward final goals. Implementing supportive family, friends, and co-workers can also help one work towards creating a self-concept.

In the end, improving self-concept must be done for the individual, not for anyone else. It’s a slow process but important. People should periodically check their self-concept; it changes over time.